I made a resolution to myself years ago that I would make a serious effort to pursue and improve my writing.
I’ve always been interested in writing stories and telling tales–hey, maybe I’ll even write a novel one day–but somehow job, career, and family always seemed to take a higher priority. And so no progress was made toward my goal.
There wasn’t enough time left over at the end of the day to work on my fiction after getting home late each night from work, then cooking dinner, then spending quality time with the family. I was too tired, mentally and physically. And if there was a spare moment here or there, other projects, emergencies, and duties jumped to the head of the queue, demanding attention.
If only there was more time in the day, I’d have time to work on my writing.
If only I didn’t have so many other obligations, I’d be able to focus my schedule and make progress toward my goal.
If only there weren’t so many other more important things to do, I’d be able to do something for myself.
You know what?
If you truly want something, you’ll find the time for it.
So when I caught myself making endless “if only …” excuses for why I wasn’t making progress on my writing, I realized that the problem wasn’t all the external obligations, duties, and responsibilities I had that kept me from my goal. Rather, it was my internal lack of commitment and strength to take seriously my own goal that I had declared.
When I caught myself in my own lie, I resolved to recommit myself to my goal, starting from scratch, with renewed commitment and strength.
And you know what?
I found the time.
It wasn’t easy though:
- I cut out time from my sleep to sneak in a writing session here and there.
- I declined many social invitations.
- I sold my television.
- I trimmed back the number of non-priority projects I was working on.
- I drank way too much coffee.
- I realized I essentially was doing more work for other people at the expense of my own health and happiness, and was wasting my time on things that weren’t getting me closer to my goal.
If you truly want something, you’ll find the time for it.
However, there was a price for my diligence.
I found myself lost when my friends discussed the television shows they were watching or the movies they had seen at the theatre.
I didn’t know the latest pop music albums/songs.
I missed out on all the excitement of people playing all the new online and mobile games.
But you know what?
When I started taking my writing goal seriously, within the last two years I:
- got accepted to a top-ten graduate creative writing program
- was invited to read a flash fiction story at an international art symposium
- won a horror writing contest, judged by Dr. Michael Arnzen and Raw Dog Screaming Press
- got a short story published by an online journal
- published a collection of my own haunting short stories
- was asked to edit a well-received book of inspiration, motivation, achievement, and philosophy
- found the time to secret myself away to a writing retreat on a (haunted?) island.
This, after basically starting my writing career from scratch.
I’m currently in Maine on a writing retreat:
Just last night, I heard Jim Kelly read a flash fiction story:
I heard Nancy Holder read her new work:
I heard poets, memoirists, essayists, and master storytellers like Liz Hand, Boman Desai, Tony Barnstone, Sarah Braunstein, Annie Finch, Aaron Hamburger, Joy Harjo, and Debra Marquart. I’ll work with David Durham, Scott Wolven, and others. All of them inspire me with their energy and enthusiasm and passion for writing.
I’ll be eating with, listening to, and learning from these people, and more, over the next ten days in a concentrated revelry for those serious about improving the craft of their writing.
And I’ll be setting my alarm earlier than normal. And going to bed later than I should.
And I’ll be losing out on the latest Reality TV results.
And I won’t know who won this or that sports contest.
And you know what?
The problem with goal setting and achieving your goals is not external, it is internal.